Chronic Pain.. I’ll say I’m ok

Deafening Silence

Deafening silence. Still I could not be heard

I wear my pain like a foghorn
Somedays my silence kills the room
Learning to dance in the rain
Learning to fight through the pain
Heavy clouds fill my eyes by day
Night falls banks burst pillows stain
Everyday pain every night pain
Across my face you may not see this pain
But listen in closly you’ll hear my pain

Its been four years maybe more of living with pain

Chronic pain. 

After awhile you stop speaking about it. After a while you stop complaining. It’s very hard to explain that at every single moment of everyday you are feeling pain.

A point comes when you want to take all your prescribed drugs in hope of a good nights sleep. Doctors will give you any drug you want as not to feel useless in your struggle. Take some more mophine lets not think about the lovely side effects and addictive properties it possesses. So many who do not know about these drugs are now hooked, self medicating to numb the pain or is it now to feed their addiction. I’ve been there but luckily I saw what was going on, be it not at the time but eventually. I’m now the one asking my doctor isn’t there something else you can give me instead of all these opiates. A point comes when you don’t even want to take any more medication, it becomes too much filling your body with drugs constantly in the hope of masking the problem.

A point comes when all you have left for the pain is silence. I can not feed into it any longer, I can not give it any more strength. I’m going to starve it with silence. To my pains and frustration I will now say.. I am ok and ok I shall be

-Dionnd MT-

Breathe Think Write Release

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