Looking for love?! Look No further..

We must learn to love ourselves before we can love another.
This is a well known fact now.
Knowing our self worth is so important.

So many times in our life we search for a partner, someone to love us, someone to make us happy. We walk into relationships searching for someone to complete us.

We come with our baggage, we come with our expectations and with all these needs. We come and unsurprisingly we eventually have to leave.

Should we not be going into a relationship already happy, already whole. Should a partner not bring additional joy to your life, not the only joy.

At times we get into relationships, two broken beings feeding of each other’s soul. Two stagnant souls you’ll be, stuck in a rut trying to fix each other.

Instead we should focus on being happy whilst single. When alone; this is the time to learn to love yourself, learn to respect yourself, find out what makes you happy, be happy, motivate yourself, dream big, get out of the bed in the morning for yourself. Focus on being the best you.

If you do this, you will not worry about being single, you will not worry about finding a suitable partner. You will understand there is no need to worry.

When you both do unite, you will help elevate each other to the next levels in your lives. You will enhance each other’s happiness. You will build together, you will inspire each other.

Does this mean we have to be perfect before we enter a relationship? No not at all. We just need to love ourselves.

It sounds so basic, but sometimes we don’t realise we don’t love ourselves, until we start loving ourselves.

-Dionne MT-

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#BreakTheCycle Let’s talk about mental health

#BreakTheCycle 

1 in 4 people each year will experience a mental health issue, 1 in 6 adults each week experience the same mental health issue. These numbers blow my mind but at the same time do not surprise me. I think the situation could be even worse due to the fact there are so many who hide these issues, there are so many who suffer in silence and there are many who do not recognise they have an mental health problem as they have several coping mechanisms they’ve subconsciously devised. These people usually only realise there’s an issue when all their safeguards fail and a major event or crisis takes place. 

Society has tainted the phrase mental health, it’s become a word associated with shame and embarrassment. A word of weakness, so often the next word that follows it is the word “crazy” or phrase “that person isn’t right”. Where did this way of thinking come from? People are afraid of what they do not understand. 

What you find is that we’ve all brought into this negative way of thinking when it comes to the topic of mental health, including those suffering. Maybe I am crazy? Maybe people won’t want to speak to me. Maybe I’ll be shunned. Maybe they’ll scrutinise everything I do or say If they know, maybe this, maybe that. All this torment for someone experiencing an mental health issue only adds to the problem. This fear of being judged usually leads to people not seeking out the help they need. 

Mental health matters, you matter, reach out
Any condition be it physical or mental, left untreated is only going to get worse. Instead of prevention help is sort when a person is at breaking point suffering from a crisis. Maybe things would never even reach breaking point if we acted when the first signs arise or if we recognised the signs to start with. Be it professional help or self help, there must be an acknowledgment of the issue.

There are so many people who are lost in the system or being failed by it. It should not be so hard to get access to mental health services when you need them. When it comes to seeking helping this in it itself is a major put off for some people, the barriers and lack of understanding. The way the system is set up is so difficult for those who actually want help. When you do finally get through to someone 6 months later where would you even start, you may no longer be in a state of crisis but still very much need help… Good luck getting a correct diagnosis from someone who is following a tick box criteria in a limited time slot. Something definitely needs to change. 

This is why I think it’s so important to talk about mental health issues with your peers, you’d be so surprised at the amount of people you know who may suffer with a condition. Conditions such as depression and anxiety are very common these days. These are mental health issues that may seem minor on the surface but they vary in severity from person to person, left unchecked they can and have become fatal like many other mental health issues.

We can’t always rely on the system to help us, sometimes we have to help ourselves because whilst we wait on the system passively we are not getting any better or any closer to controlling whatever it is that is going on. 

There are things you can do to help yourself such as:

– Do your own research

– Find support groups

– Talk to friends and family

– Practice mindfulness techniques

– Keep a diary to try and see what works for you and what doesn’t

– Meditate

– Exercise 

These are just a few things I can think of, but my point is do not rely on anyone or any service blindly. Yes seek out the help you need but don’t just wait and expect them to wave a magic wand over you and make you better. There is only so much medication can do, the cognitive side will still need to be tackled at some point. 

I would like to add a disclaimer, for anyone who is in a mental health crisis please go to your nearest A&E or call 999, if you are already under a mental health team follow your care plan, alternatively book an emergency appointment with you GP or get in touch with the Samaritans or one of the other support groups/services which I’ll leave links to at the bottom of this post.

Mental health is no joke, we need to take our mental health as serious as our physical health. Without the mental there is no physical.

-Dionne MT-

Breathe Think Write Release 

Useful Information:

  1. How to access mental health services
  2. Find Mental health support services near you
  3. Mental Health Foundation
  4. Generalised Anxiety Disorder in Adults
  5. Anxiety UK
  6. Talking therapies explained
  7. Depression Alliance
  8. Rethink Mental illness
  9. Men’s Health Forum
  10. Bipolar UK
  11. Young Minds
  12. No Panic
  13. Samaritans
  14. Crisis Services

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    Thought of The Night: Believe In Yourself 

    If you believe in yourself anything is possibleNever stop believing in yourself, even when those around you doubt you.. keep on believing, keep on trying. 

    We’re more powerful than we realise. The only failure is in not trying. Give yourself a chance to succeed. 

    Your past does not have to define you. Fall seven times rise eight times, look at yesterday’s failure as experience for today and tomorrows success.

    Once we free our minds from limited thinking we begin to see life can be limitless, we don’t have to live according to the confinements of society.. we dont have to do what’s expected of us, we can do anything we put our minds to. 

    -Dionne MT-

    Breathe Think Write Release 

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    Positivity & Negativity’s Loaded Gun

    If I erased the insanity would it take away my creativity?
    If I erased my positivity would it take away my sanity?
    Positivity is my saving grace it will be my lasting legacy
    It’s all I have to save me from me to bring me serenity 

    What did negativity ever do for anyone
    Passion killer it’s like walking around with a loaded gun
    Asking for trouble trigger fingers itching to let it go off
    Trying to keep composure faking hard no one wants to appear soft

    Positivity is the key I’m trying to bring good vibes to the party
    That nothing’s impossible you can do anything mentality
    We can change our minds we can actually change the structure of our brains, we are truly a powerful people
    Far from ordinary stained glass windows at the altar is not the only place you’ll see a miracle 

    I’m trying..

    -Dionne MT-

    Breathe Think Write Release
    Positive people also have negative thoughts they just don't let these thoughts control them

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    Spilled Ink

    My soul bleeds ink pain spills out on to the pages 
    Back pedalling tracing back the different stages
    The different stages of my life 
    Nightmares unraveling before my eyes
    Masked by dreams destined to one day arrive
    What a life the stories I could tell
    Destined for heaven I’m sure I’ve already tasted hell
    I’ve got the scars to prove it the memories to haunt me 
    I’ve stopped trying to white my pages colourful they now empower me

    -Dionne MT-

    Breathe Think Write Release

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    Sipping tea like Kermit

    Painting pictures picasso love
    They’re not deceiving us 
    Who are they trying to convince 
    Is it them or us
    The worlds looking in like we don’t give a fuck
    In your love you need to trust
    The sacredness is being lost
    Posting mug shots sipping tea like germit
    Two mugs clinking does he or she deserve it
    With twitter fingers you say one thing
    Hotline blinging sweet talking another’s thing
    Singing two different songs
    Broken record it’s just wrong 
    Looking through the window of your soul do you believe the things you say
    We sit back shake our heads and laugh at the games they play

    -Dionne MT-


    Breathe Think Write Release

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